Monday, December 15, 2008

Benfleet Essex Boys

The Moyle arrived in town the day after The Feast of Octave of St. Camillus, the townsfolk pushing and shoving to get a look at him. His black bag swinging at his side, he strode towards the Church of Perpetual Sinners where he was to meet with the rector’s assistant over biscuits and church house wine. The Alagoas Macei brothers were in cahoots with the Benfleet Essex boys, the Macei brothers known for their cunning, the Benfleet Essex boys for their strong-arm tactics. The brothers and the boys were conspiring to steal the jamb to the rector’s closet, unstopping the door where the biscuits and saintly wine was kept. The rector’s assistant, a mild tempered calmly man, was a skulk, stealing into the closet after prayer to take a swig, leaving but a drop of un-transubstantiated wine for the following day’s Mass. Knowing this, the brothers and the boys, each known for their own ungainly hiving, swore they’d catch the fairly brother in the act; and when they did, thrash him within an inch of his life.

The eldest of the Alagoas Macei brothers, having a way with burglary, was skilled not only in the art of cunning but at busting through doors, jamb and transom alike. The youngest of the Benfleet Essex boys had fists the size of catchers mitts and knuckles whet on eyeteeth and cheekbones. The mild tempered calmly assistant, though not a man of intemperance, could connive the lowliest of sinners into believing that church wine was a cure for low back ache and whooping, and worth a penny or two in the offering plate.

The Polzela brothers ran a small family-owned bakery in Brezovica fiefdom, the eldest brother not knowing the difference between a tea biscuit and a scone. In Lyon Rhone-Alpes there lived a man, a portly man, who could pull rabbits out of his hat, a skill not much admire by the weakly and faint of heart. The man in the hat’s ear caught wind of the man from Lyon Rhone-Alpes, but not wishing to upend the balance of hats, which was precarious at best, resisted the urge to pay him a visit and scold him for his tomfoolery. It would only be a matter of time before he fell willy-nilly into despair, as men of such common fodder seldom lived comfortable undisturbed lives.

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